As I’ve pondered further the challenges the Circle is facing now, and been talking about it all with Nicola, we came upon two previous instances in which the same basic thing happened. One was the Circle entering into a lawsuit in the Course copyright controversy nine years ago. And the other was me embarking on a new life and bringing Nicola over here from England to join me in it five years ago.
In both cases, I entered into the process on faith, just because I believed I was doing the right thing. I/we had had guidance and that was enough. However, in both cases, I had no real appreciation of the immensity of the financial challenges that were facing us. The lawsuit, for instance, really had the possibility of burying the Circle. The change in my life was far more financially demanding than I had realized it would be.
Yet in both cases, a very large amount of money came through, out of nowhere. With the copyright controversy, we discovered that three different people had died and left the Circle in their wills. The money from those estates not only paid our legal bills, it saw us through some incredibly lean times. Without it, I hate to think what would have happened. Nothing like it happened before or since.
With starting my new life and bringing Nicola over, the money from my father’s estate made it possible. His death was quite a blow as it was extremely sudden. However, the money from his estate did make this major life change possible, and did see Nicola and I through some lean years as the Circle slowly rebuilt (after the previously mentioned crisis!).
What strikes me now about these two situations is that while I had no real clue about the immensity of what was coming, clearly Somebody up there did, and arranged a response that was similarly immense. I really wish it hadn’t involved people dying. However, I decided that if the whole thing was arranged, it was in some way right for everyone concerned-the people who died and all the people affected by their passing. It was somehow arranged so that everyone moved to their next right classroom.
These two situations totally upend our usual assumptions in the face of a crisis. We assume that the Holy Spirit has no real idea of the immensity of what we are facing. He must not, because He’s doing so little. Therefore, it’s up to our little arms to carry the whole thing, at least as best we can.
What those two situations taught me, however, is that the Holy Spirit actually sees what I am facing far more accurately and realistically than I do. He is not in denial and He is not blind. And He’s actually looking out for me better than I could.
In other words, He’s got both sides covered better than I do, both the awareness of the problem and the handling of the response. What a reversal of how we normally think!
So I have been using this thought for comfort. If what’s coming really is big, then the Holy Spirit sees it better than I do, and He is arranging a response that is just as big.