I did a class on how the events of our lives are lessons. I have recently come to a new understanding of this important topic and I wanted to share what I had come to. Undoubtedly, this new understanding is partial at best, but it has a right feeling to it, and it’s a big advance beyond my past understanding.
The idea I presented at first provoked a lot of questions, then a lot of enthusiasm, then a request that we continue the discussion. And then I got emails about it afterward. So it apparently sparked quite a lot.
So what I decided to do, based on a suggestion in the class, is do another class on it next week, in which we can just all process it together. If you have questions or comments, you can ask them in that class, and you can also put them below here in this blog. I’m not going to try to answer them now. If I do, I think that will take away from that upcoming class. But it will be great to have a list of questions and comments from the blog to take into that class.
Here is an expanded version of the notes I taught from yesterday. Again, I invite your questions and comments below, which will contribute to the next class.
MY NOTES FROM THE CLASS
The idea of our life events being sent to us as lessons—we are all used to it. Is this a Course concept? YES.
Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again, so where you made a faulty choice before you now can make a better one, and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought to you. (T-31.VIII.3:1)
But how? Does this mean the Holy Spirit is sending us trying lessons? Does He send that kind of lesson, painful lessons? That smacks of the familiar “I’ll punish you till you stop doing that.” Which the Course openly says is not how God works. So what is going on?
There is a related puzzle: Where do the events of our lives come from? Here are two quotes that ascribe literally opposite sources to the events of our lives:
They are dreamt by our minds, based on the ego
External conditions are produced by the thoughts of many, not all of whom are pure in heart as yet. (Helen’s notes)
They are planned by the Holy Spirit
What could you not accept, if you but knew that everything that happens, all events, past, present and to come, are gently planned by One Whose only purpose is your good? (W-pI.135.18:1)
I’ll present a number of categories that may seem disparate and note entirely related, but they will eventually contribute to a single picture which, it seems to me, solves both questions we’ve just asked: 1) How are the events of our lives lessons? and 2) Where do they come from?
Though the lessons are ultimately the same, specific forms of the one lesson are assigned to each and every interaction during each day, lessons that can be learned that very day.
He will be told all that his role should be, this day and every day. And those who share that role with him will find him, so they can learn the lessons for the day together. Not one is absent whom he needs; not one is sent without a learning goal already set, and one which can be learned that very day. (M-16.1:1-7)
The ego is using the events of our lives (like sickness) to teach us its lessons. It wants events, in other words, that seem to justify learning the ego’s lessons (such as “I’m one with my body and thus separate from God”).
How do you think that sickness can succeed in shielding you from truth? Because it proves the body is not separate from you, and so you must be separate from the truth. You suffer pain because the body does, and in this pain are you made one with it. Thus is your “true” identity preserved, and the strange, haunting thought that you might be something beyond this little pile of dust silenced and stilled. For see, this dust can make you suffer, twist your limbs and stop your heart, commanding you to die and cease to be. (W‑pI.136.8:1‑5)
The one original error fragmented into countless tiny fragments—the events of time and space. God then gave the Correction, and specific and corresponding forms of this correction were placed in each event in time and space.
The tiny tick of time in which the first mistake was made, and all of them within that one mistake, held also the Correction for that one, and all of them that came within the first. And in that tiny instant time was gone, for that was all it ever was. What God gave answer to is answered and is gone. (T‑26.V.3:5‑7)
The word “sacrifice” is an example of the previous concept: a verbal form that seems to teach the ego’s lesson (“to serve God’s interests I must sacrifice mine”) but in which the Holy Spirit has placed a new lesson for it to teach (“when I serve my ego’s interests, I sacrifice my own”).
Although in truth the term sacrifice is altogether meaningless, it does have meaning in the world. Like all things in the world, its meaning is temporary and will ultimately fade into the nothingness from which it came when there is no more use for it. Now its real meaning is a lesson. Like all lessons it is an illusion, for in reality there is nothing to learn. Yet this illusion must be replaced by a corrective device; another illusion that replaces the first, so both can finally disappear. (M‑13.1,5)
Every encounter is arranged because there exists between us and the other person a “potential” for something of God to happen. In every encounter, the Holy Spirit is playing a kind of divine matchmaker.
The plan includes very specific contacts to be made for each teacher of God. There are no accidents in salvation. Those who are to meet will meet, because together they have the potential for a holy relationship. They are ready for each other. (M-3.1:5-8)
One of God’s gifts is to orchestrate our passage through time and space, such that we are always in the right place at the right time; meaning, God’s gifts are always within our reach.
God is indeed your strength, and what He gives is truly given. This means that you can receive it any time and anywhere, wherever you are, and in whatever circumstance you find yourself. Your passage through time and space is not at random. You cannot but be in the right place at the right time. Such is the strength of God. Such are His gifts. (W-pI.42.2:1-6)
The early Course concept of Atonement: I did something hateful in the past and still carry the burden of this. If, in a similar situation, I do something loving, I cancel out my past mistake.
Esther had hurt something you love, (The Shield ) by writing a report you regarded as very bad [one that jeopardized The Shield’s funding]. You atoned for her by writing one [Urtext: in her name] that was very good. The reason it was a miracle was because it not only atoned for Esther, but also for you because it kept the children from harm [and in a past life, Helen had “hated and hurt” the children]. (Helen’s notes)
[Helen wanted to spend the evening washing her hair, but Jesus told her to visit her mother-in-law.] It occurred to me while waiting for the elevator that I was glad I was going, because it was a way of atoning to Jonathan [Louis, her husband] for my being so nasty to him. (He is always happy to have me visit his mother) and in a way of atoning for Dave too [who just died and had expressed a lot of lovelessness in his life]. (Helen’s notes)
Retain your miracle-minded attitude toward Rosie very carefully. She once hurt both of you, which is why she is now your servant. But she is blessed in that she sees service as a source of joy. Help her straighten out her past errors by contributing to your welfare now. (Helen’s notes)
Our old expressions of hate remain in our minds as burdens that drag us down in the present. Our expressions of love (miracles) in the present allow these burdens to be erased from our minds.
As every gift my brothers give is mine, so every gift I give belongs to me. Each one allows a past mistake to go, and leave no shadow on the holy mind my Father loves. (W-316.1)
[Helen was praying very intensely for her husband, with Jesus joining her in that.] We [she and Jesus] told Jonathan that he should forget about the Alexandrian library [repository of ancient learning and wisdom which was destroyed] and all the rest [this apparently refers to past life transgressions], because it does not matter. He showed a lot of love this time [in this life], and should claim his forgiveness. He does not need to hurt himself and must stop those symptoms of disequilibrium and establish his freedom. He woke up, and said he was feeling better but hungry. (Helen’s notes)
Our trying, difficult, and distressing events in the present are lessons. They are places where we made faulty choices before, presented to us again, so that in the same place, so to speak, as our past mistake, while being tempted to repeat it, we now can make a better choice, and thus have the lingering pain of that old mistake wiped away. We shouldn’t fear temptation, then, but be glad of it.
Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again, so where you made a faulty choice before you now can make a better one, and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought to you. In every difficulty, all distress, and each perplexity Christ calls to you and gently says, “My brother, choose again.” He would not leave one source of pain unhealed, nor any image left to veil the truth. He would remove all misery from you whom God created altar unto joy….
The images you make cannot prevail against what God Himself would have you be. Be never fearful of temptation, then, but see it as it is; another chance to choose again, and let Christ’s strength prevail in every circumstance and every place you raised an image of yourself before.
Let us be glad that we can walk the world, and find so many chances to perceive another situation where God’s gift can once again be recognized as ours! (T-31.VIII.3, 4, 9)
Here is what I believe puts all these different elements together into one package
Based on our ego, we try to dream situations in place that teach us the truth of the ego’s lessons, teach us that the ego is right.
We design these situations, then, to provoke us to repeat our past mistakes.
The Holy Spirit says “Great, that is where I want you. That’s not My ending point, but that is My starting point.”
So He takes it from there and modifies things to contribute to a new outcome.
He adds into each situation the correction for our past error, the truth which we failed to choose before.
This correction is therefore literally present in the situation.
It may be present as a silent voice, urging us to choose differently (“My brother, choose again”).
Or it may be more visible, an audible voice in the situation itself (like a teacher telling us to make a different choice.)
Or it may be actually built into the situation as our job in that situation (like Rose serving Helen and Louis’ welfare as their housekeeper).
Either way, in light of that correction, the situation is now teaching us a different lesson, urging us to make a different choice.
The Holy Spirit also makes sure of two additional things:
- He makes sure that the situation is such that it’s within our ability to learn the new lesson, to refuse our past mistake and choose the correction instead.
- When we do that, the situation somehow responds. It’s ready for us to do that. It responds to our choice, reinforces our choice. It reshapes itself so that it now strengthens our new choice, actively teaches the new lesson, just as its old form strengthened the old lesson. It may refuse to do this, but if it does, a doorway will open and you will be ushered out of it, which is also a way in which it cooperates with your new choice.
All of this has the purpose of not just adding a better choice on top of your past mistakes,
but actually having the better choice replace the past mistakes.
If you simply remove yourself from any situations that would tempt you to repeat past mistakes, you never actually have to choose against them. You never really have to say no to them.
Thus, they stay in place, hidden in your mind, casting their shadow on your state of mind at all times.
The new choices have simply been added on top of them.
There is a story of the Buddhist meditation teacher Jack Kornfield going off as a young man to a lengthy meditation retreat in the Far East and becoming quite advanced in meditation. He seemed very advanced spiritually, but when he returned to New York City and began entering into relationships with women, he found that his patterns in those relationships were exactly the same as before he became so spiritual. The new spiritual truth had simply been added onto the old ego-patterns, such that they lived side by side, without the new actually replacing the old.
In this system, by being tempted to repeat the past mistakes and yet, in the face of that, choosing the truth instead, the past mistakes actually disappear, and leave no shadow on the holy mind our Father loves.
Exercise
Think of some situation that has been a persistent challenge for you.
Perhaps it has even repeated in different forms, with different people in different settings.
Perhaps you resent it being there.
Perhaps you have felt God, if He were nice, would take it away.
Perhaps you feel that, quite simply, you have been put in the wrong classroom.
Why does it have to be so hard, you wonder?
Isn’t there an easier way to learn?
Now consider that you are perfectly placed.
You are exactly where you need to be.
You need to be in a situation that tempts you to repeat your old mistakes.
It’s only when you feel the temptation to repeat them yet choose something else that you can actually escape the old mistake.
Consider also that the correction for the mistake has been placed in the situation and is therefore literally present in it.
Perhaps it is present as a silent voice, whispering to you to make a better choice.
Perhaps it is present as an audible voice in the situation, someone or something actively counseling you to make the better choice.
Perhaps it is something in the situation that actively draws the better choice out of you.
Either way, it’s right there, beckoning you to make a better choice.
This choice is the opposite of what you chose before.
It is some form of love designed to be the mirror image of the form of hate you chose before.
Realize also that the situation has been carefully designed so that it’s truly within your ability to make that better choice, here and now.
Finally, realize that when you do, the situation itself will respond and reinforce your new choice.
Just as the old situation was designed to draw out your past mistake, so the situation as it now exists will be designed to encourage and strengthen your new one.
And if you do all this, the past mistake will actually be gone from your mind.
It will no longer be sitting in your unconscious, weighing you down, casting a shadow over all of your thoughts.
It will actually disappear, and leave no shadow on the holy mind your Father loves.
So you need not resent the temptation and distress this situation represents for you.
You can see it as the perfect lesson it really is.
And so instead, you can be glad.
[Please note: ACIM passages quoted in this article reference the Foundation for Inner Peace (FIP) Edition.]
If you enjoyed this article, you might like this one!
To learn more about our community of A Course in Miracles students, visit Course Companions.
